There's this dude

In my neighborhood who looks like Elvis. He must be in his 70's by now. He's been living here even before me. He's even had the same shitty car since then. It's gray and rustier than Paris Hiltons' vagina. Disgusting. What gives him the Elvis look is his hair. I don't even know what to call that hairstyle, and I do not want to know. If I ever found out I'd probably die laughing. I'm silly like that. This guy always wears a car mechanics uniform, but I have a feeling he isn't one. I have a very good feeling he gets in his car and drives to an alley, parks and listens to Elvis songs while doing lines of cocaine. Sounds far-fetched, but when I get feelings like this they're always true. I am Baliwala. I tried to check into the heartbreak hotel but it was full. That is all.